(Not Quite) Random Quotes
You are not alone, I’m with you. I’m lonely too. What’s that song that can’t be sung by two? A broken home, a broken heart, isolated and afraid, open up this is a raid. I wanna get it through to you, you’re not alone.
— Mavis StaplesArchives
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Author Archives: Kalani Perry
Funny
“Ha.”
“That’s not funny.”
“The situation is abnormal.”
“That doesn’t make it funny. It makes it what it is.”
“Are you always this serious?”
“I am what I am.”
“You’re sort of fucked up.”
“Look at yourself.”
“Fair enough.”
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Loudness
It’s thundering again. Small changes in things. The big boom. Normally I like things smaller. I don’t like to shout and I don’t like being shouted at. I’m not one for loud noises. Too many of them when I was a kid. We all blame our past. It can’t do anything but be what it [...]
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A better person
“She’s a better person than I could ever be.”
“I don’t think that’s true.”
“She’s my daughter.”
“Okay, so you have to think the best about her. That doesn’t mean you have to think less about yourself.”
“I don’t think I ever loved myself.”
“I love you.”
“I love you too, K.”
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One day we’ll be strangers in our own land
Shush. Be quiet. There’s a knock at our door. Be safe. How can you be safe? It’s raining. Go to the back room. Your nose is bleeding. Maybe you should let them take you. Maybe they can help. I don’t want to see you like this.
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Lies
Prayers are success failed. Keep asking. Keep wanting. Nothing ever comes true.
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I don’t know about living
But I kinda know something about dying. I’ve been on the ledge. Do you want to walk with me? It’s not that hard. It gets easier with every step. Do you love me? Show me.
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I drank your language
You’re hurt. Your heart. I felt you. I always felt the way you moved.
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Darkness cost and dollars lost
“I love you.”
“You don’t mean that.”
“Why do you say that?”
“You say it to every pretty girl that crosses your path.”
“What makes you think you’re pretty?”
“C’mon.”
“Baby, I know I rock your world.”
“So why do you fight me?”
“For the same reason you ask, ‘Why?’”
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Beauty
“I look beautiful in your pictures.”
“You are beautiful.”
“Lies told when we’re almost asleep. Tattoos. That doesn’t mean love.”
“What does?”
“I don’t know. Show me.”
“I thought I did already.”
“Show me again.”
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I look at the moon and I think of you
So bright, and so close. It feels like if I could reach you I could touch her. She is in more ways than one, a metaphor for you. Mahina. You seem so close, but I can’t reach you.
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You do a lot more damage then you think you do
Punch the wall. Break your hand. It doesn’t matter. The bones and the muscle don’t matter. They’re just things to think about when they hurt. You can’t make hurt go away. I promise you nothing less than hurt. Embrace the pain. It is you.
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How will you meet your end?
Can you stay as strong as you seem. There’s Hell upon the breeze. Can you make it through the heat? He had to die. Now how do we live?
“You’re so dramatic.”
“I’ve been this way since the day you’ve known me.”
“It makes you a good fuck.”
“That’s why you’re here?”
“No. I sorta love you now.”
“Sorta?”
“Sorta.”
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There’s a smile in the sea of sadness
She put the ice to my face and then it melted away. I woke up and my hands were gone.
“Are you okay?”
“I’m still breathing, right? I still know how to use a comma. Sometimes people take a part of you with them. My eyes are burning, and I think my nose is bleeding. Where are [...]
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Miracles
“It’s a miracle when I can say I love you.”
“I don’t believe in miracles.”
“You will.”
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Do you love her?
“Of course I love her.”
“Is that why you guys sleep in the same bed?”
“There are other reasons.”
“Do you love her?”
“Always have and always will.”
“She could do worse than you.”
“Thanks.”
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Her
Why does it always have to be this way? Maybe for once I hate you instead of adore you? It’s a trap. This thing we call love. We could call it anything. It’s that hand on the knee, the kiss. We are chimpanzees. We require touch like monkeys. How do we be more than ourselves?
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It reads hard
But I didn’t mean exactly what I said. I never hated you; I sort of hated myself. I loved you. More than I should have. And now we see the consequence. Of pain. You hurt me. Goodbye.
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Path
There’s a walk back, and there’s a way back. Sometimes you have to find it. I want to say, “Fuck you,” so badly. I think I will retreat. Let the fuck you’s slide. Be someone my daughter can be proud of, for once.
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Limits
There are no limits to what some men will do. Look at the ground. Look at your hands. There is evil everywhere. Feel the feeling. Know the knowing. Come inside. Come.
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Change