Tag Archives: asshole

The phone

“He said you called.” “I did. What did he tell you? “That you’re an asshole.” “Perhaps.” “Why do you do this fucking shit?” “He called me.” “No, he didn’t.” “He facebooked me.” “You’re such a child.” “I’m not arguing that with you.” “I love you.” “I know.”
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I like obvious lies

I like the way words can mean whatever the fuck you want them to mean. Asshole. Liar. I guess they’re your’s too. Cunt. Fuck. They’re comforting. Like the sunrise. You’re pretty sure that no matter what is said, it’s still going to happen.
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Ears

“In that picture. It’s sort of a caricature. You made my ears really big. Do I have big ears?” “They’re not small.” “You’re an asshole. I rarely point that out. And almost never with a picture.”
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Love or something like it

Unfortunately? We go were the asshole, the heart, we go where it leads us.
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Crest

I woke up this morning and my mouth tasted like an asshole’s asshole.
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Condescending asshole disorder

Intermittent explosive disorder is a behavioral pathology that manifests as anger, sometimes rage, disproportionate to the situation at hand, immediately followed by deep remorse. For something that sounds like an awesome excuse for every impulsive stupidity ever committed, I can’t quite get behind a disorder that sounds so much like what it is.
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    He’d never heard that song before, but he still gets the metaphor. — The Hold Steady

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